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New York —Beleaguered radio
shock jock Howard Stern, who has spent the last month fighting
indecency charges by the FCC, was caught off guard Friday
morning when Pope John Paul II called in during the middle
of his show.
A spokesperson for Infinity Broadcasting claimed the 83-year-old
pontiff was not a scheduled guest but made a surprise call
after hearing a particularly risqué show featuring
several midgets, a bevy of lesbians, and "The Wheel of
Gas."
According to sources, Stern was unusually polite to the Pope
as they chitchatted about everything from the FCC charges
to the Paris Hilton video to how he felt about lesbians.
"I only had to hit the delay button once or twice,"
Stern said. "Even though he was swearing in Latin, I
definitely wasn't taking any chances."
During a regular segment called the "Wheel of Gas,"
The Pope could only sigh as several contestants had to endure
a gassy torture to win breast implants and other prizes.
"He was a good sport," Stern said afterwards. "He
couldn't really contribute much since he wasn't in the studio
but he was a pretty fair judge. I think he handed out like
five pairs of new breasts. Then he blessed them."
Stern, says he tried his best not to offend the Pope, and
waited a tortuous 15 minutes before finally asking if the
Pope ever went "commando" under his robe or if he
liked lesbians.
"For the record, the Pope loves lesbians, though he
didn't say so explicitly," Stern said. "But c'mon,
who doesn't?"
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