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Venue: U.S Military Base, Doha, Qatar
Date: April 25, 2003
Legendary entertainer Bob Hope gave what may be his final
USO performances for Coalition troops stationed in Qatar last
week. The actor and comedian who turns 100 on May 29th and
has performed for soldiers in every war since World War II,
appeared giddy and full of excitement as he took the stage
to thunderous applause by the appreciative audience.
Hope greeted the crowd with the same authority and vigor
of a man in his mid-80's, with the only indication of his
onward years, a few wrinkles, some white hair and a large
intravenous drip attached to a nearby pole.
Things progressed well as he joked with the young soldiers
that he didn't know where he was and felt "lightheaded."
The audience roared with delight. Hope, feeding off the energy
of the crowd, then did a sketch where he appeared to have
a seizure and then wet himself. The soldiers howled with laughter.
Soon afterwards, things began to go wrong. Terribly, terribly
wrong.
During a comedy bit in which Hope, in full drag, had to exchange
witty banter with co-star Brooke Shields, he truly started
to look his age. Perhaps it was the bright red lipstick and
blond wig that somehow didn't seem as funny next to his corpselike
complexion-- or maybe it was that the pratfalls seemed a little
bit too real, with Hope trembling and crying out for help,
and then eventually falling into what seemed like a semiconscious
state.
Comedian Phyllis Diller and actress Connie Stevens, both
longtime members of Hope's famous USO shows, tried to make
the best out of a bad situation --even trying to play off
as a joke when a nearby heart monitor flatlined twice in the
middle of a sketch. "We've been meaning to get that darn
thing fixed," Stevens joked while Diller casually put
a mirror under Hope's mouth. When Hope eventually gurgled
out an answer, Stevens retorted "I meant you, not the
machine!" But at that point, the laughter had died down,
and the air was filled with silence, confusion and the smell
of fresh urine.
The new Bob Hope USO show was not too shabby, all things
considered. While the material appears somewhat dated and
the drag queen bit doesn't pack the same wallop in 2003 as
it did in 1943, I would still recommend it to those with strong
stomachs and who want to see a legend one last time.
Hope will be performing four shows a week through May and
hopes to play some dates in the U.S. before he begins work
on his next television special.
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Above:
Bob Hope says World War II was much more fun than the current
war
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