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SEOUL, South Korea - A multinational contigent of
doctors and psychologists made the shocking annoucement Friday
that North Korea has been suffering from "short man's
disease," which had gone undiagnosed for more than 50
years.
"Now that we have a diagnosis, we can help search for
a cure," said South Korean Foreign Minister Lee Soo-Hyuck
who promised to send his country's best researchers to study
the incurable disease, which generally causes diminuative
men to appear tougher and meaner than their actual physical
size would indicate.
The affliction, which has plagued the Western World long
before Napolean came into power, had never before been seen
in Asia, where short men are the norm and short angry Asians
are more funny than threatening.
DPRK leader Kim Jong-il brushed off the diagnosis, and dismissed
offers from the United Nations to send medical aid workers
to examine afflicted Koreans.
"We are not afraid of the Americans. We can beat them
despite the size of their weapons. Any aggression by them
will be met by nothing less than nuclear holocaust. We can
easily destroy your big cities and there's nothing you can
do about it."
As a gesture of goodwill, U.S. National Security Advisor
Condoleezza Rice sent Pyongyang a giant giftbox containing
self esteem videos by Tony Robbins and 20,000 shoe lifts.
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