Reprinted from Bob's private journal

Dear Journal,

Well, today marks the official end of tax season, but instead of being ignored until next winter like usual, I was fired. Can you believe this? I'm going to calmly acknowledge that after 15 years at Septicorps, they tossed me out like last week's rancid tuna sandwiches in the company cafeteria .(Note to self: Try to incorporate previous sentence into screenplay) The senior VP said it was because of the economy and lower earnings and perhaps they would rethink their decision in the future if things change. I'm not stupid! Everyone knows the white establishment has always tried to keep creative, rebellious types like myself in line. Now I know how Spike Lee feels. READ MORE OF BOB'S JOURNAL»
**New entries 5.15.02**

WILL BOB GO POSTAL?

To: Bob from Accounting
From: Darren Browne Sr. VP
May 5, 2002

We'd like to thank you, Bob from Accounting, for all the years of hard work you gave to Septicorp Enterprises. We will truly miss you, insert employee name here, and wish you all the best in the future. If you should ever need a reference, we would be happy to provide one for you. For legal reasons, we will have to disclose you were fired for substandard performance, but feel free to call on our help anyway. Also, since you are no longer part of the Septicorp family, please leave all keys and badges with your appropriate manager before you are escorted by security guards beyond the outer parking lot. We deeply regret having to let you go, Bob from Accounting. Please remember, harming former co-workers or stealing office supplies is a felony and would require a lengthy jailterm should you be convicted. Good luck with all your future endeavors as long as they are not within 50 yards of Septicorp property.

CRAPPY POETRY CORNER

"Holding Hands"

If people all around the world
Stopped everything to hold hands,
They'd feel like idiots,
Because the people without hands would probably take over the world

—Liz Valentin

Are you a crappy poet? Send it in