Date: Sun, 16 Jun 2002 18:54:50 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> || Subject: Horse Back Riding To: sur@xxxx.net

My family and I are going to be visiting Durango and we would like to go horseback riding. There are five of us. Myself, my wife, my sister, and two kids. All of us, aside from my sister, are hearing impaired. My wife is able to hear okay with her left ear, but the rest of us are completely deaf. My sister will be coming along and serving as a translator for us. Hopefully she will be able to sign all of the instructions we need. I would like to know if our disabilities would prohibit us from being able to horse ride. I hope that it won't, and that we can ride through the mountains just like cowboys. Hope to get a response from you soon.

Thanks,

Mike Ockisard (IT''S ME SHIZZY -- YOU KNOW THE DRILL)

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> | To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com>, sur@xxxx.net Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Mon, 17 Jun 2002 22:46:14 -0600

Hi Mike,

Thanks for your interest in our services. We would be happy to take you and your family on a horseback ride. I don't see any reason that being hearing impaired would prohibit you from horse back riding. Just let us know when you are going to be in Durango and we can make a reservation for you.
We look forward to hearing from you.
Thank you,

Tara Philips

Date: Mon, 17 Jun 2002 22:28:56 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> | Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

Hi Tara!

We are going to be taking the train to Albuquerque and renting a car to drive up to Durango. We will be in Durango for the first week in August. The 1st through the 7th. We would like to go horseback riding sometime between the 3rd and the 6th, sometime in the afternoon. I am so excited I can't sit still. I do have a couple of questions to ask that I hope you will take the time to answer. We are city people, and the great outdoors are foreign to us. Are there any poisonous snakes in Durango? Are their any animals that we should be aware of while on the trail? If we were to encounter a bear or lion would our guide be able to scare it away? I hope we can enjoy the beautiful mountains on horseback with your help. Hope to "hear" from you soon!

Mike

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> | To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Fri, 21 Jun 2002 11:47:06 -0600

Hi Mike,

There are a few rattle snakes around the area, but they are not very common. I have lived on the ranch for 37 years and have never even seen one. The bears are scared of people so they don't stick around very long. There are no grizzlies here. We have never run into anything on any of our rides except maybe deer and elk, so I don't think it's anything to worry about. The animals hear you coming and take off before you are ever very close. Our guides will definitely take care of you! The guide will also give you a short riding lesson before you go. Where are you coming from? The rides are at 2:00 in the afternoon so let me know what day you would like and I will make a reservation for you. Also, please send me ages and weights of everyone. Please feel free to email me anymore questions you have.

Thanks,

Tara

Date: Sun, 23 Jun 2002 13:32:40 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> ||Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

Hi Tara,

I was worried that you might have had to evacuate because of the forest fires. Glad to hear we won't be in any real danger of being attacked by animals. We are originally from Manhattan, but have lived in New Orleans for the past ten years. We are very much out of our element when we venture into the great outdoors. The 6th seems to be the best date for us. My two kids are twin boys. They are 12 and weigh about 185. My sister is 35 and claims to weigh 135 but I suspect she weighs 150. Tragically, my wife is morbidly obese. She has a genetic condition that has left her at 300 lbs. If this is too much for a horse to handle then maybe she can ride in a cart pulled by a horse. Do you have such a thing? I am 45 years old, six foot nine, and weigh almost 240. Will we need to buy spurs or cowboy hats? I can't wait to get out to the west! We are very excited about our trip. Hope to hear from you soon!

Mike

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Mon, 1 Jul 2002 15:37:00 -0600

Hi Mike,

So far we have not been evacuated yet. The fire is about three miles from the ranch right now, so who knows what will happen. We have been shut down except for our two hour rides. The other places we use for day rides, pack trips, etc. are on fire. I hate to have to tell you this, but I am sorry we cannot take your wife. We have a weight limit of 250 lb. We do not have a cart that a horse can pull and if we did the trail is not wide enough for something like this. I am really sorry. You do not need to buy any special equipment for the ride unless you just want to. A lot of people just come in tennis shoes. The one thing we usually suggest that you bring is a bottle of water to take along.
Would you like to go at 10:00 a.m. or 2:00 p.m. on August 6th? Let me know and I will get you down!

Thanks,

Tara

Date: Tue, 2 Jul 2002 13:42:13 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> |Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

2:00pm on August 6th sounds great, Tara. I was afraid that my wife's weight would create a problem. My wife has an idea for a way that she can join us in our horseback riding fun. Since she won't be able to ride a horse, she would like to rent a 4 wheeler to drive. Her idea being that she could go along with us on the ride through the mountains following behind in the 4 wheeler. If this might work I will need to make arrangements to rent a 4 wheeler ahead of time. My wife marches to the beat of a different drum for sure. She tries her best not to let her condition control the way she lives. I would tell her to walk the damn trail, but that would only land me a spot on the living room couch for a week. I appreciate the time you are taking to answer my questions. I appreciate your kindness. Thanks Tara. I hope to hear from you soon.

Mike

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Tue, 9 Jul 2002 08:19:23 -0600

Hi Mike,

I am sorry, but I don't think this would work. A lot of the trail would not be wide enough for a four wheeler. If we think of any other options, I will let you know. I have you down for August 6th at 2:00 p.m.

See you soon!

Tara

Date: Wed, 10 Jul 2002 20:21:36 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> |Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

Hi Tara!

I have exciting news! My brother in law has expressed a desire to go along with us horse back riding in Colorado. He is a famous actor from both stage and screen. Eric Roberts has been a friend of the family for many years and has been my brother in law for twenty years now. He is truly one of the kindest people I have ever known. Anyway, Eric is filming a comedy in Breckenridge at the same time we are visiting Durango. He has agreed to come to Durango for a couple of days to ride horses and see the town. As you know Eric is a pretty big celebrity and if there are any special accommodations that need to be made for him please let me know. He would have no problem signing autographs or taking pictures with people the day of the ride. He also mentioned possibly bringing a co-star with him. Probably Tony Danza. That would be great! Tony Danza on a horse! Eric did mention that he is afraid of extreme heights. Are there a great deal of spots on the trail that are really high up? No smoking won't be a problem, we are trying to cut back anyway. We will wear the appropriate attire and some stuff that will surely embarrass my kids. Tara, again I appreciate your willingness to have this dialogue with me. I wish I could call you but my hearing is too impaired to do so. I hope to hear from you soon.

Thanks again,

Mike

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> |To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Mon, 15 Jul 2002 15:17:12 -0600

Hi Mike,

That does sound really exciting. That would be great to have both of them. We took a lady the other day who was afraid of heights and she said it did not bother her at all. Just let me know when you find out for sure and we will sure get it set up.

Thanks,

Tara
P.S. Did I reccommend the 2:00 p.m. ride because of smoke or did you prefer that time? I don't remember, but the smoke is better now and it is probably cooler at 10:00 a.m. (it has been unusually hot here). Just a thought, let me know which time would be best.

Date: Mon, 15 Jul 2002 15:12:37 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> |Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

If you think 10:00am would make the ride more enjoyable because of cooler weather than you can sign us up for that time slot. I really appreciate your taking the time to help make preparations. I just emailed Eric and informed him not to worry about extreme heights. He wanted me to ask you if there is still a hotel in Durango called the Red Lion Inn. He claims to have stayed there long ago and he enjoyed the view of a river rushing past the hotel. Is this hotel still there? Eric says that Tony has confided in him and revealed that he has a fear of brown horses. If we could arrange to have a black, white, or gray horse for Tony that would be great. Eric wanted me to ask if drinking alcohol would be allowed on the ride. He said he would like to take some moonshine with him so he can feel like a "real cowboy". Please let me know if Eric and Tony's requests aren't reasonable.

Thanks,

Mike

P.S. If anyone there at the ranch would like autographed pictures of Tony or Eric we would be happy to bring some along. They simply need to know how many they need to get from their managers.

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> |To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Mon, 22 Jul 2002 20:32:51 -0600
Hi Mike,

Sorry about the delay in responding, but I have been out of town. I moved your reservation to 10:00 on August 6th. How many people are coming for the ride? And we will find Tony something other than a brown horse. Yes, the hotel is still there, but it is now the Doubletree Hotel. I will check with Tom about the alcohol on the ride.

Talk to you soon,
Tara

Date: Tue, 23 Jul 2002 00:48:38 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> ||Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

Hi Tara,

It is going to be myself, Tony Danza, Eric Roberts, my sister, and the two kids going on the ride. We are really getting excited now. Hopefully Tony can bring some of his moonshine. Eric said he promises not to get drunk. That would be dangerous. Let me know if drinking and riding is prohibited. I myself am a recovering alcoholic and I haven't a drop to drink in years. I do smoke marijuana from time to time, but I wouldn't want to do so in front of the kids. I just purchased a cowboy outfit that my kids called "hideous". What do they know? I think I am ready for the wild west! I bought a red cowboy hat, boots with spurs, a bolo tie, and some chewing tobacco. Well it's actually big league chewing gum, but that's good enough for me. We can't wait to get out there! Hope to hear from you soon. Thanks Tara,

Wild Bill Hockisard

From: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net> |To: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding Date: Wed, 24 Jul 2002 08:42:44 -0600

Hi Mike,

I have a reservation for six people on August 6th at 10:00 a.m. Tom said he doesn't care about the moonshine as long as they can sit on the horse. Also, we recommend that you bring a bottle of water for the trip. As far as the pictures of Tony and Eric, we would probably like about 10 if that is possible. (We also heard that Eric is Julia's brother. Is that true? They said they would take her along for free. Ha Ha!)

See ya soon,
Tara

Date: Wed, 24 Jul 2002 19:50:26 -0700 (PDT) From: "Michael Ockisard" <xxxxlock1@yahoo.com> |Subject: RE: Horse Back Riding To: "Saddle Up Riders" <sur@xxxx.net>

Hi Tara,
Yes, Eric and Julia are brother and sister. They do not get along though. In fact Eric rarely speaks of his sister. Eric was drunk one night and he told me the reason they don't speak is because of a huge argument they got into long ago. They were vacationing in Thailand and went to see some kind of shaman (wise man) that some villagers had told them about. After a long hike they found the wise man's small home and they talked at length about existence and spirituality. Eric says that he told an off color joke to the wise man that had something to do with Julia, a Polish priest, and a pink kazoo. Julia was so angry that she swore to never speak to Eric again. Tara, I hate to be the bearer of bad tidings, but I would like to formally cancel our appointment to go riding with you. As I mentioned earlier in our dialogue my wife is severely overweight. She had been eating and sleeping so much that she became bedridden. We had to push her through a giant tube lined with mayonnaise that went through our bedroom wall and outside into an oversized ambulance. I can't tell you how much of a disappointment this is. She was with me when I was drinking too much, and now I must help her battle her insatiable hunger for food and daytime television. Our concerns are with her now. Hopefully she can win this fight and we can all go out west and ride horses. When that day comes I will contact you again. I apologize for the inconvenience and I thank you for your time.

Mike
P.S. Eric says that he and Tony will likely just show up in Durango sometime in the next couple of weeks. So, be ready for those moonshine drinking cowclowns.

Tara is surely eagerly awaiting the arrival of the world's two greatest thespians.

Peace Out, Shizzy